After an exhaustive search the greater New York metro area, I can happily crown the WINNER of the 2009 Monsters of Cock contest! I received dozens of submissions from "hung men," complete with pictures. My girlfriends and I reviewed said entries and narrowed it down to the "final five." I personally met with the final five for cock-size verification purposes. OK, OK, I might as well be honest! In addition to verify cock-size, I also wanted to fuck these super-hung men.
Without further ado, measuring in at a jaw-dropping TEN inches in length and the thickness of a Glade aerosol dispenser... I am pleased to present to you, TITAN!
Of course, women appreciate a well-groomed man. Even when I am interested in a man, if he is too hairy down there I typically avoid performing fellatio on him.
The following two videos get my seal of approval:
Yes, I of course am referring to the Ultimate Cock Blocker! Not only did this club manager keep me from fucking two of my favorite cocks, he denied all the club members from watching a live porno featuring me, Nigel, Athena and Rocco. Words cannot describe how I feel about the Ultimate Cock Blocker. I know the month of May still has a few days left, but I am so confident that I will not meet a bigger jerk than this guy in May, that I am publishing this post early. I feel that this douche may just be the winner of Wall of Shame 2009. In the coming months, I will be taking your votes for this "honorable" award.
Almost as many women as men instigate the idea of group sex -- 46 percent compared with 54 percent, according to the sizable RedHotPie.com.au survey, which drew 8,763 responses from among its 1.5 million member listings. Alright, I'll admit that it doesn't sound like that the most statistically significant survey, but it's pretty interesting!
A narrow majority of those engaging in group sex are couples, rather than singles, and most of the couples participate together.
This may be particularly interesting for those men who have emailed me and asked me to "convince" their women to come to a swing party. Instead of being back-handed and tricking your lady into coming to an event or party, maybe you should be honest with her? Maybe she'll share her fantasies with you once you are so open with her? Shocking!
For more interesting tidbits and conclusions, read the full article.
Nigel and I had been planning to meet for weeks. Due to busy work schedules, we had not gotten the opportunity to see each other for quite some time. I invited Nigel to come over my place for some fun. Mere hours before, I suggested that we instead meet at a local swingers club that was hosting an anniversary party. Rocco and I thought it would be a lot of fun; I wanted to fuck Nigel's giant cock in front of a crowd, as I always enjoy exhibitionism. We also invited Athena.
I should mention that I have hosted parties at this particular venue many times. While it is not ideal, it is a decent space located in Manhattan.
The party was set to begin at 8pm on the Thursday night. We arrived at the club promptly. Of course, the promoter was not there yet. There were a few older men that had arrived waiting for some action. The club was bright and fully lit because the janitor had not yet dimmed the lights (or changed the sheets).
Nigel, Rocco and I entered the club and headed back to one of the far play-areas. We were also waiting for Athena, who would be Nigel's date for the night. Apparently couples were free -- not that Nigel would have any problem with paying. Athena's train had been delayed, but she was apparently a few blocks away -- and communicating to Rocco via txt messages. We wanted to have some fun right away because Nigel was on a time crunch and had to leave for work by 9:30pm.
I was really horny. I mounted Nigel, and we started making out. Within a few minutes, all the single men had congregated in the room to watch. I took Nigel's cock out, and started sucking. My pussy was so wet. I wanted to fuck him so bad! I grinded my hips on top of Nigel and gave him a lapdance. I took out his hard cock and started to suck it.
Rocco was stroking his cock. I grabbed it as I was licking Nigel’s dick. Athena said she was on her way up and we were anxiously waiting for her. I couldn’t wait much longer. I wanted Nigel’s hard and ready cock inside my wet pussy. The next thing we know, the club owner walks in. He approaches Rocco. "Your friend has to come up and pay." First of all, why does the owner address Rocco and not Nigel? Second, why would he let Nigel in without paying in the first place? Nigel had been walking around with us for at least a half hour while we were touring the club and talking. The issue was not the payment, but the manner and time at which the request was made. It's 8:30pm, and we are giving the single men a sex show -- why the fuck is this idiot interrupting???
Athena finally arrived. Apparently, the owner had also hassled her at the door! So, wait, now he not only hassled Rocco, who has brought hundreds of people into the shabby club -- but he also harassed a Unicorn??? Single women are supposed to be swing club gold! "So are you here to see someone?" he asked. She responded, "Yes, I'm with Rocco and Sex Kitten -- and Nigel." He pretended that he didn't know us.
Rocco was upset. We both felt totally disrespected. This asshole cock-blocked us! Rocco said "I think it's time to leave..." as Athena made her way over to us. And so, we did. I put my dress back on; Nigel pulled up his pants and tucked in his shirt. I was seconds away from fucking him and I was extremely frustrated. The three single gentlemen who were politely watching our little show were also appalled. "That's just bad business!" said one of the men.
The owner finally realized what he had done. He chased us as we made our way to our car. We jumped into the car, which was parked right on the street. The owner screamed, "Wait! Come back!" He called Rocco's cell. We had no interest in replying. We came to the party to have fun. We make his second-rate club look damned good -- over the past 6 months we have brought hundreds of patrons in. We were scheduled to host an event at the location in June. But between the owner's lack of management skill, cheapness, and disrespectfulness -- we're done with him.
Throwing parties is my hobby. I don't do it for the money. That's why my events are so good. I actually care. I throw events unlike any other; our guests are so comfortable -- and they always get a chance to explore their sexuality in whatever way they wish (i.e. voyeurism, exhibitionism, soft-swap, full-swap). There is no logic in hassling regulars at a club, let alone us, who bring in massive business.
So, Nigel , Rocco, Athena and I had nowhere to fuck -- we had been interrupted in the most abrupt manner possible. Even I felt like I had blue balls, I can only imagine how Nigel and Rocco felt! I was extremely horny. Rather than driving back to our place, Rocco suggested that we use the car. This presented a bit of a problem. First, we didn't have tinted windows. Second, the car was rather low to the ground. Third, there wasn't much room in the back seat of the mid-sized car. But, we worked with what we had and managed to save the night.
Rocco announced that we would commission the car a temporary "Bang Bus"! He started driving, looking for a dark area to pull over. Some streets were crowded, others were just too creepy -- you never know what lurks in the shadows of Manhattan. All the while, in the back seat, Athena and I took turns sucking Nigel's cock. Rocco looked around for cops and anyone who might be offended -- amazingly, no one really noticed what we were doing.
I deep throated Nigel's beautiful dick. Athena licked his balls. We rode around for a good half hour, switching positions, sucking dick and fingering each other. Near the entrance to the Lincoln Tunnel, Rocco found bus depot. He pulled in between two large buses for cover. I continued sucking Nigel's cock. Eventually, we headed back to drop Nigel off or he would be late for work. I sucked him furiously until he came inside my mouth! It was hot, and exhilarating. But, I was still so horny – I needed at least one cock inside me.
We kicked Nigel off at the curb without pay in typical Bang Bus style—just kidding. We headed home, and Rocco took turns fucking me and Athena until we all came. Hey, at least we made the best of a bad situation, as we always do!
You always talk about how much you love big dicks. I have always seen big dicks and have been curious about them, but I am too scared that I will get hurt. I think I'm scared of big dicks...Can you offer some advice.
You are correct in stating that I have a big dick fetish. But I do like to fuck cocks of all sizes (well, maybe not all - there is such a thing as a dick that's TOO large). I don't dicks-criminate. Unfortunately, I am one of the few women out there that promotes big dicks. Through my blog posts, I have made many women fantasize what it would be like to have a thick member plowing through the walls of their pussy; making room for the big dick as it reaches further in with every thrust until the pussy lips reach the dick's shaft or hit the balls (aka: "Balls Deep"; a title of Lexington's production company ).
Additionally, I am a die-hard Lexington Steele fan. There aren't many porn-stars who are as equipped as Lex is. Unfortunately, the overwhelming majority of women I meet have absolutely no idea who he is! I'm thinking of having a Porno Night Pajama Party and play all my favorite Lexington Steele movies for the ladies! Once you see Lex's thick, meaty 11" cock enter inside a lovely woman on the big screen, your fear will subside and will be replaced with lust. I'm not just a member--I'm the President of the Lexington Steele Fan Club for Women!
The fact that you are curious about big dicks is very natural. To get over your fear, I suggest that you try the following in private. Fantasize about the longest, thickest and hardest dick meat you've ever felt inside you. Remember how warm and hard it was? Close your eyes and imagine putting the dick inside your mouth and getting it all wet before it's ready to enter your wet vagina. At first, the dick has to be very gentle so that your vagina can adjust to the thickness. If the dick is not wet enough, you will have to go back and lick the shaft with your spit or use a drop of lube. It also helps if the holder of the big dick licks you orally and inserts one or two fingers inside you to make sure you are ready. Ok you are all wet and it's ready to go in.
At first, think about sliding only the head in. It is a little thick, I know, but you want it and he takes it nice and slow. As soon as the head is in, the back of your vagina is calling out for more meat. You ask the dick holder to gently work his way in with long, deep yet sensual thrusts. No need to hurry or shove it in. At this point, as you are fantasizing, grab a nice, thick silicone dildo (not a vibrator, but a dildo) that has veins and is ribbed. One of my favorites is a Doc Johnson seen here. I have also felt the ultra, real-skin dildos which may work seen here.
Or, for the Babeland lovers, here's a silicone one for twice the price: (vanilla-out of stock, sorry ladies).
Have fun masturbating with the "big dick" dildo and fantasizing. If you have a good time, your fear of big dicks will subside. Also, a "big dick" is relative. For me, I like to be with a nice, meaty thick cock even if it's as much as 6-7". I mean a TRUE 6-7"; not the bullshit standard a lot of men seem to use when they add 2-3" inches to their actual dick size and claim to be 8". A true 8 incher is a pretty long size in my opinion. I also prefer thick dicks to thin ones. Further, just because a man has a large dick doesn't mean that he knows how to use it or can get it hard all the way. Of course, some men do and that's why they have been written up on Swing In The City. Considering all these factors, you shouldn't fear the big, bad "big dick." If you have a fantasy about riding a big dick you should go for it. One approach may be to start small and work your way up. If you need help finding these big dicks, email me -- I know a few good dicks...
Rocco and I were excited to attend the house party that we had been invited to. I dressed in a sexy outfit and hot shoes. The party was in a one-bedroom apartment about 600-700 square feet. It was located in a sleek, modern building. It was 10pm, but the lobby of the building was crowded. As we walked by the doorman on our way to the elevator, I looked at the crowd and smiled at Rocco. These neighbors had no idea what was happening in their building.
Upon knocking on the apartment door, we were greeted by a tall woman. She said her fuck-buddy was hosting this party -- and this was his apartment. Sugar-Fuck apparently worked in finance. The woman proceeded to give us a tour of the apartment. It was a nice apartment -- but why was she taking the time to show me the kitchen and the washer/dryer? I was here to have fun, not purchase a property in the building!
The hostess was good-looking, but a little scary. She was dressed in all black and seemed extremely dominant, impolite and pushy during our conversation. She asked us what we were "looking to get out of this party." The way she asked us was a little off-putting -- we weren't sure, as we were among the first guests to arrive. If the host was looking for a particular type of guest, shouldn't he have posed these questions to us before the event? I politely replied that we just wanted to come check to party out and see what happens. I didn't disclose to her that I was extremely comfortable with my sexuality and very open with swinging and sexual exploration. There was something about her that made me feel so uncomfortable and uneasy--and I was somewhat of a seasoned swinger! Imagine how a "newbie" couples would feel like when talking to her!
The woman stared at us for a little while and then replied: "Oh, well, let me just define what you two are. It's important that you know the terminology in the scene. You two are what is known as a soft-swap couple -- you are not comfortable with going all the way yet." She continued on and gave me a Wikipedia definition of soft-swap couples. I had to keep myself from laughing! This lady was trying to psychoanalyze us without even giving me a chance to talk. If she only knew about my prior sexpeditions! We just looked at her and replied, "Ah, we suppose you're correct." I now think about what a terrible hostess she was and how off-putting she was--she was the very model of how not to behave as a host. Despite her obnoxious attitude and judgments towards us, Rocco and I remained positive and moved along.
The host was sitting at his computer desk typing. What a friendly guy. He was chatting on his instant messenger attempting to invite more people over. There was a loud, obnoxious woman sitting on the couch. We sat down next to her, and she grabbed me. She asked if we wanted shots. We told her, "No, thanks." She quipped, "Well, I'm going to have one!"
Another young couple arrived. I was so happy to see them. We tried to engage in small talk but were quickly interrupted by the hostess. I suppose she was sizing them up and trying to figure out whether they were a "full-swap" or a "soft-swap" couple as well. The loud lady offered them shots and, because they were nervous, they gladly accepted. A few minutes later, this supposed orgy had turned into a drinking party.
The loud lady again insisted that we take shots. At this point, she started to harass me. I then firmly replied, "No thank you, I don't drink." She replied, "WHAAAAAAAAT? OH MY GOD! Did you hear that, guys? WOOOW! Just TRY it honey!" in her high-pitched voice. In an attempt to keep myself from going deaf, I walked away to talk to the host who continued to browse Craig's List. He didn't have much to say to us either. I could tell this was going to be a disaster.
It was already getting late and we were wondering if anyone would ever start fucking. Not that I wanted to be with any of the guests, but we wanted to see some action! Were we even going to see a partial breast or something? Nope!
We sat back down near the couch area and watched the rest of the guests getting trashed. Of course, the loud lady offered us more drinks. I was getting really annoyed by her. And then, she screamed, "Hey, I have an idea--let's play a drinking game!!!" It was like being back in college, except people fucked in college. These people were just here for the free booze.
Rocco and I looked at each other and knew that it was time to go. We tried again to meet like-minded, younger people who might want to fuck -- and FAILED. As we were making our exit, the hostess said a few more words to us, practically begging us to stay. We scrambled to get our coats -- we couldn't get out of there fast enough!
I understand that people want a few drinks to mellow out. But why do so many "swing" parties consist of people getting plastered? When people get drunk, the sex does not improve; it gets way worse. Men can't get it up when they're hammered. If you want to drink, go to a bar. Don't mix getting drunk with fucking at a swing party! The two are mutually exclusive. And if you are a person who would choose drinking over sexual exploration, please don't ruin other people's fun by going to a swingers event and causing problems (i.e. throwing up, passing out, insulting others, etc.)
Why do I continue to share these horrific experiences with the readers? Because I want everyone to know that they are not alone in the bad experiences they've mostly likely had. I also want to let the newbies all around the world know that they should not be disheartened by a bad experience like this awful house party. When you find a *REAL* group of swingers who are good-looking, courteous, polite, intelligent, non-judgmental and friendly, you will never be faced with these bad times again.
I will continue to share these experiences through the blog in hopes of bringing together the swinger community. If you would like to share any of your experiences, please email me firstname.lastname@example.org. You can choose to remain anonymous and I will respect your confidentiality. I am also always open to suggestions and comments about the School of Sex. I'm on a mission to throw the BEST lifestyle parties and events in New York City! I use my past experiences as a guide in order to determine what NOT to do at my parties and ensure all the guests attending feel comfortable, calm, confident and cool.
As our events have grown, Rocco and I haven't been able to enjoy ourselves as much at our large parties. After all, as hosts, talking to dozens of guests and making sure that everything is running smoothly dominates our time. It is our goal to make sure all our guests are comfortable and relaxed at the large parties. We were also looking for a way to provide even more fantastic parties to some of our sexiest guests... So we implemented the elite "SoS Private List" and began to throw more intimate parties.
Our first SoS Private List party was on Friday... We invited three couples, three singles ladies, and a monster cock. The party was nothing short of amazing.
Kate arrived early because she was curious about the Sybian, and wanted to have some "pre-orgy" fun. Her test ride didn't last for long. Kate and I have amazing chemistry, and we were more interested in each other (and Rocco) than the machine. I really love licking and fingering Kate's sweet pussy -- and so I did! I also started stroking Rocco's cock. The three of us made out... until, "BUZZZZZ." More guests had arrived!
Rocco went to the door to see who was it. The lovely West Indian knock-out, Ava, from our Cinco de Mayo party had arrived with her Latin lover, Rico. As they walked in, they saw that Kate and I had already started the party! But, we realized we should probably stop for now, and greet everyone. Athena had just arrived as well.
Elizabeth, a tall, sexy blond woman arrived next. We met Liz at the last party as well. She had approached me at the Cinco de Mayo party and asked "So, where is all the cock?!" I knew that Liz was my kind of lady! Not only that, but Liz's body is nothing short of amazing. I was completely taken aback, even the second time I saw her. She had worn a sexy outfit -- I could see her hard nipples right through her top, and she was wearing hot heels. Whew! Well, the Sybian was still in the middle of the floor, and Liz wanted to try it. She took her clothes off. I was totally taken aback by her open sexuality. Before long, we were making out. I noticed that Ava had begun sucking Rico's cock. Ok, now the party had started!
We moved the action to the next room. It began with a circle of four ladies on a bed -- Kate, Athena, Liz, and me. We were caressing each other, fingering each other, making out, and tasting each other. Rocco entered the room; he was rock hard and started stroking his cock. It didn't take long for Rico and Ava to follow. Our next guest arrived, and I greeted them in a silk robe. Jason is very muscular, with a very large cock. Jason was a regular at SoS paries; he originally came as a single guy but most recently brought a gorgeous woman to the Cinco de Mayo party. His gorgeous date's name was Lidia and she has the biggest firm breasts I have ever seen.
As the fun had already started, I told Jason and Lidia that they should just strip down. After all, we all wanted to see! I knew they would both be comfortable, and they stripped. Jason's big dick caught my eye. Even half-hard, he was very long and thick. I got really wet. Then Lidia unleashed her beautiful breasts. Wow! The room grew silent. These giant boobs looked like they were fake, they didn't sag at all! Rocco and I made our way over to Lidia. We sucked on her beautiful breasts together. They were very soft but very firm. I was amazed. Rocco agreed that Lidia had the hottest chest we had ever seen in our lives! I felt Rocco's rock-hard cock as Kate took Jason's cock for a ride.
But Lidia's boobs weren't the only spectacle of the night. I had invited a single male to attend our party. After all, we had three single ladies who were extremely horny and wanted to fuck. Titan, the lone single male I invited, arrived shortly after Lidia took her top off. Titan is hung like a horse. His cock is literally the size of an aerosol spray can! He's 10 inches long and extremely thick. It only took a minute after Titan walked in for his clothes to come off.
I saw Ava gasp as she noticed the size of Titan's monster cock. Ava is a bit shy, but she quickly made her way over to Titan. Athena had already started sucking his cock, and Ava joined in. It was a HOT scene. Yes, I know how to pick the finest gentlemen and the ladies were appreciative. A few minutes into the blowjob, our final guests arrived. Jackie and Lawrence, from our last penthouse party, made their way into the play area after Jackie tried the Sybian. Jackie was extremely wet.
Ava was ready to take Titan's huge cock. He eased it in her wet pussy and started pumping. She asked him to take it slow, and he listened. As he pumped her, I could see the look of ecstasy in her eyes. She was loving it! But a few minutes later, she had to take a break. Athena had been on the sidelines after sucking Titan's cock, but she wanted her turn. She took Titan like a champion. Titan fucked the hell out of Athena, while Rocco got friendly with Lidia. Both girls were moaning. Lidia kept saying, "Oh shit! Oh shittttt! ... but I LIKE IT!" Rocco fucked her just how she liked it -- fast and furious. Titan built up the pace with Athena, who just wanted more and more.
The scene was extremely hot. This was way better than any porn I've ever seen. Real people having real hardcore sex and loving it. This is what lifestyle parties are all about! I watched everyone having fun and played with the ladies, but now it was time for my fill of cock. I was curious about Rico, and made my way over to him. Ava was recovering from Titan's huge cock, but I knew that Rico was a champion too. After all, at our last party, he had fucked Ava for HOURS! I was right--for a man to fuck his wife for that many hours, he has to be good. Rico fucked the hell out of me. I took him on missionary-style. He pumped his thick member inside my pussy, pumping harder and harder each time. He had a great technique. We watched the group having fun around us. I grabbed his body close to mine and could feel him sweating. He was fucking the hell out of me and I was loving every second of it. He not only made me cum once, but twice. He kept going and going like an Energizer bunny.
After taking a short break, I was ready to get fucked again and again. I had not played with Lawrence previously and was curious about him. I had already seen Kate giving him head a short while back and he had me intrigued. I went over to Lawrence and smiled at him. Ladies, this man has a gorgeous body. I noticed his well-defined pecks. He had a smile on his face and as I looked at him, I couldn't resist any longer. I grabbed his hard cock and put it inside my mouth. I noticed his expression and body language. I could tell this man wanted a really, really sloppy blowjob. How did I know this? I can't divulge all my secrets; but I was right. The sloppier his dick got, the more excited he was. He shifted his body up a bit to touch my face. He plopped my head down on top of his cock as to tell me to go deeper. I went down as deep as I could and he started moaning. I looked back at Jackie and told her that she could come join us. She smiled back and said that she enjoyed watching. So, we gave Jackie a show. After receiving a very wet blowjob from me, Lawrence was ready to reward me with his cock the only way I like to be rewarded. He strapped on a condom and got right up on top of me. His cock felt so good inside of me. I got even more excited as I looked up at his sexy body and innocent-looking face. He may look innocent but he fucked like a baaaaaaad boy. He knew how to fuck a lady. I had to thank Jackie for letting me take him on a wild ride.
Everyone was having a great time. There was tremendous chemistry between everyone present as everyone had met before this party, so it made it very easy to just go after what you wanted. If I was to go into detail about who fucked who, this post would be the length of a novel. We all had sex for about 6 hours. Of course, we took some breaks for drinks and snacks. During a pizza break at midnight, Liz hit it off with Titan. They were conversing for awhile, and I could tell they wanted each other. So after people started messing around again, Liz took Titan for a ride. Titan's big dick must've felt really good inside Liz's tight pussy. She was in the other room, and we heard her moaning from the bedroom. "Ooooooooooh." A few of us made our way over to watch the duo. Liz came hard as Titan fucked her. It was so hot!
Back in the play area, Rocco was getting his dick sucked by Athena and Lidia. Both girls knew how to give amazing head, and I could see his eyes roll back into his head as he experienced the amazing blowjob. He took turns with both girls.
It was getting late, but I wanted a piece of Jason. Kate was really horny too. Rocco took Kate while I took Jason. Jason fucked me hard. He has such a thick, hard cock. I was loving it! What a night it was. We fucked and fucked, and fucked some more!
Since it was almost 5AM, I invited Kate and Athena to sleep over our place. We all woke up the next morning fully satisfied, but very horny. Kate needed more action, so Rocco gladly provided. He took Kate as I used a big dildo on Athena. The party, and the morning after, was almost too good to be true. Rocco and I keep thinking that we hit the pinnacle of success in terms of throwing fantastic parties --but somehow, it keeps getting better!
I have made it my mission to explore ANY and EVERY swingers event I hear about in the tri-state area (NY, NJ, CT). No one gives me special access, and I do not ask to get in for free. I come as a guest looking for fun. But why can I NEVER find the party I'm looking for??? I think I've finally come to the conclusion that it's because the organizers simply do not give a shit. These clubs and parties are an illusion. "Walk into an erotic fantasy world and experience bliss..." Yeah, right...
I would love to attend other quality events; but each and every event or club is run by greedy men who don't have the first clue about how to provide a safe, sexy, warm environment for people to explore their sexuality. Not a cock tease. Not a "let's get drunk until our wives make out" fest. But simply, a swing party with a good crowd -- and plenty of action, if one so chooses to observe or partake.
Every single party promotes itself as providing this ideal environment of which I speak -- but every time, it's been a complete lie. (Swing clubs are different, except for Checkmate's "velvet rope" lie, none of the clubs in NYC brag about "hot" crowd.) But, unbelievably, the organizers of these events manage to convince their crowds that although the party wasn't as kickin' as they had promised, the one before it was amazing, and the one after it will surely break all records. This is all marketing bullshit -- and I'm sick of it. None of these parties are run by a woman who genuinely wants to make a quality event and is not in it for money -- and that is precisely why SoS is so amazing. Let me share my latest experience with you...
A friend of ours told us about a group that she suspected threw very hot, upscale parties in Manhattan. She had never gone to the events, but had joined the group's Yahoo Group and had been following the posts for several months. Rocco and I joined the group as well, and it seemed like we may have finally stumbled upon a decent party in Manhattan (besides, of course, our own SoS events). I will not disclose the group's name out of courtesy, but if you email me I can certainly let you know who it was.
The group was promoting the hell out of their Cinco de Mayo "Birthday Bash." When I say promote, I mean PROMOTE -- no less than fifty emails were exchanged about the event in the Yahoo Group. They hyped this thing up so much that Rocco and I were really excited about going! It was supposed to be a great venue, and a packed house. The pictures of past events on the web site looked great, although we noticed the same people in every picture. We wondered why, as veterans of the "scene" in NYC, we had never heard of this group before.
We had such high hopes, and were eagerly anticipating the event. We were extremely impressed by the fact that the group REQUIRED people to pre-pay for the event online. The event was not cheap either -- at $150, we were expecting a really good event and a decent sized venue.
The emails we received kept building the excitement: complimentary champagne and vodka drinks, an erotic chocolate tasting, whipped cream, amateur body massages, and plenty of rooms for "getting down" including an all girls room.
We received the address the day of the party. We were also intrigued. Was this a great loft space we hadn't heard of? We were hoping to learn about how these people threw parties akin to "walking into your own FANTASY WORLD, leaving the world world with its primitive rules, on the outside. It's where, if you choose, anything can happen, and usually does!" as described on the group's website. The group also said it was extremely accessible to newbies and promotes a very friendly atmosphere. All lies, as you will soon find out.
We arrived at the location on West 46th Street. A goofy looking man greeted us in the lobby, and asked for our names. He had a thick stack of printouts -- everyone guest's name and required full-face picture. The list was sitting on a table. I was shocked by the lack of discretion. The man verified that we were on the list and guided us to the fourth floor. Rocco and I looked around. The group had rented a "Newstalgic Spa," which had barely any room. The spa was decorated in a boudoir theme; the promoters hadn't done much except to clear out some space and put down some mats. As we walked in and looked around, we wondered -- what WAS this? Rocco snapped a few shots of the venue, and I have posted them with this review. I felt claustrophobic as we toured the facility. Size in NYC is at a premium, but this was a fucking joke. I've seen one-bedroom apartments that have more space! The two small play areas were a joke. There were no beds, no aerobeds, just a few foam mats and one Liberator Zeppelin. There was one sofa in the "All Girl-Girl room." Chairs were scattered throughout.
Rocco leaned over and asked me, "How the hell are they going to accommodate the kind of numbers they were promising?" The place was indeed very small -- so small, in fact, that the organizers encouraged that "up to four people" could use the non-functional sauna room. It was the size of a closet and no one could seriously play in there. You've got to love marketing -- this group's promotional email made this place sound like a palace!
There was no dance area and the "sound system" was a jerry-rigged amp speaker that was hooked up to a CD player (as pictured). To the immediate right of the speaker was a large piece of equipment that looked like an operating chair covered in a gold sheet. It was SO ghetto! The spa's front desk area had been converted into a "bar." We noticed lots of locked doors through the narrow hallway; these areas were most likely closets for storing the equipment that was usually at this spa. "FANTASY world"? What a fucking joke!
But, let me digress. I can always forgive a small venue if proper care is taken to make it functional and fun -- and especially if there are some cool guests. But even with cool guests, if people don't have inviting places to play then they won't play! The "All Girl-Girl" room was empty throughout the night. The "erotic chocolate tasting" was a plate of sample-sized Hershey and Ghiaradelli chocolates. A bag of Lindor truffles were on the side. We laughed. It looked like someone took a trip to Duane Reade and took all of two minutes to set this up. There were pieces of spa equipment all over the place, ineffectually disguised (see the sink in the picture, used for shampooing).
We looked around. As usual, at 26, we were by far the youngest people present. Most of the couples were in their 40s. No senior citizens--at least--but hardly the "young" crowd the group promoted.
We tried speaking with couples, but only one Latin couple greeted us when we said "Hi." Friendly atmosphere? Yeah, right. We attempted to find out whether any of these guests had been to past events. We had to be aggressive in getting the attention of other people, because no one wanted to talk. We spoke to a MILF whose husband was out on the fire escape smoking. The MILF indicated that they were new, but had been to an on-premise club once before. She was explicit in saying that they had no desire to play on-premise [on-premise again means, sex on-premises is permitted]. We didn't get it. Why come to an on-premise event if you have no intention of playing? But then she dropped the ball; it was all her husband's idea. Of course it was! The MILF didn't want to play, but he did. This is exactly why I hold Swing School at every one of my parties -- the MILF was very apprehensive, and that could have certainly been avoided. After MILF stopped talking to us, she made her way to the "bar" area where she remained for the rest of the night.
We approached another couple. They were new too. They had been to many off-premise parties like Skin and SexxyMofo events. They spoke to another couple about how watching people have sex was "weird." Again, why were they here? Everyone was so judgmental. The other couple said that they had been to the last event that the group threw. We asked them how it was, and the woman said, "It was great! We met this cool Dutch couple -- he was a lawyyyyyer!" We asked if anyone played. She indicated that some people did, and it was more crowded. She said she enjoyed the group because she met some "cool people." Alright, that explained it. I guess some people just aren't looking for actual on-premises fun at an on-premises event. Whatever. We told the woman that we were the founders of the School of Sex. She commented, "Yeah... that's way too umm, educational, for me!" If she only knew the types of parties we throw!
The party was still totally dead at 2:00 AM. There were very few people present, and none of the couples were interested in playing. What WAS this??
A photographer made his rounds. He had a long mustache and looked like a merge of Mr. Clean and the Monopoly guy. Mr. Monopoly asked couples whether they would like a complimentary photo for the promoter's website. When he asked us this, I replied, "FUCK NO!" He tried to get shots of the best looking girls, asking whether he could "just get a shot of their ass or boobs." Ahh, so this was the way they got those great pictures posted on the web. He was flattering the cutest girls' egos. Yeah, most were 40, but they were in decent shape. And we all know that Photoshop cures all. But, there was still no sex.
About 20 minutes later, we peeked into the "All Girl-Girl" room which now allowed men because it was completely dead. It was the photographer!!! He was fucking his assistant. This was too much. So the photographer was also the sexual performer. Two couples sat around them, watching. What the fuck!
I tried talking to some more couples, but they didn't seem interested. I felt totally scammed. This was a lame crowd -- mostly in their 40s. Most of the men were grey-haired. Rocco saw a few MILFs, but I didn't see a single cute guy. It was well after 2:00AM and Rocco was getting hungry. Besides the "erotic chocolate" there wasn't even any food. This was fucking lame.
We tried, and failed. In conclusion, readers, I cannot seriously give you a club or party recommendation except my own. Even the best of the competition doesn't come close.
But, thankfully, we knew of a hotel party going on.... so Rocco and I got the fuck out of the cock-tease event. But that story will have to wait for later!
First, I should reiterate and clarify – the vast majority of pictures on this blog are stock porn photographs (unless I specifically state otherwise). These porn pictures are shown for entertainment purposes, and they serve as a caricature of the action. I’m sorry folks, but my parties do not consist of a bunch of porn stars. If you want to watch porn stars in an orgy, might I suggest buying or renting the “Orgy World” porn series. My parties consist of real people – carefully screened, attractive, respectful, and open-minded. Additionally, I would NEVER allow cameras at a party of mine--NONE of us want nude photos of us to spread over the Internet. I respect everyone's privacy and am always very discreet. This is precisely why I use aliases when I write about people. Did you really think my name was "Sex Kitten"?
Don’t get me wrong, we have some real knock-outs that attend my parties – I had a former Playmate and a Hollywood producer contact me about attending my last party. Models have attended, as have actors. But the majority of our guests are not models. Some women are voluptuous and short, others are tall and thin. But all of my guests are attractive. Of course, beauty is highly subjective. For that reason, we try to have something for everyone. We have guests of all body types, races, religions, and professions. I should note that I do look for people who are height/weight proportional, but more important than height and weight is presentation and attitude – namely, open-mindedness.
At the Cinco de Mayo party, one couple was inducted into the Wall of Shame. The male was Australian with curly blond hair and an athletic, swimmer-type build. She was Canadian, very tall, thin, and blond. Rocco saw the couple sitting in a corner; so he introduced himself. Rocco indicated that we were really pleased with the turnout (we had over three dozen attractive couples, most of whom were under 35) and thanked them for coming out. Rocco then asked if they had ever been to a swinger party. They indicated that they had, in Canada. Then the Canadian woman continued, “Can I be honest with you? We were expecting a different type of crowd. You know, more people like us.”
The couple was a model of the type of pretentious people that I do not want to attend my parties. They come in with a negative attitude, lots of judgment and extraordinary expectations. It was clear – they had a problem with other ethnicities and curves. This is New York City, and our parties represent a microcosm of the city. Maybe these two would have preferred a neo-Nazi convention, where everyone was white, blond haired and blue-eyed. Unbelievable!
Rocco was having a Harry flash-back, but controlled himself this time. Expeditiously, Rocco interjected, “I totally understand. In fact, let me offer a solution to you. I will tell the owner of the venue to give you the entrance fee back if you go to Le Trapeze, the most famous New York swing club, and let us know what you think…” Rocco knew that the moment they stepped into Le Trapeze, they would run out – screaming. If they thought our crowd was sub- par, I can only imagine what they would have said at Trapeze after seeing the retirees! Rocco’s tactic worked. He gave them the address, and told them to email us with a review.
We thought they were gone-good riddance. But, after about an hour, we saw the couple came back to the party! Apparently they re-paid at the door. And, get this – they had found another couple, a really hot couple from Montana. The woman in the couple was tall and blond (big surprise!) and her man was tall and athletic. I guess our crowd really wasn’t as bad as they had thought. Rocco was thinking of kicking them out, just based on principle – but it was funnier watching them. They kept looking over, embarrassed. Well, they should be!
I even went over to say hi to the couple again only to have the Canadian awkwardly excuse herself and go to the bathroom. It really takes balls to return to a party after you insulted all the guests. But, it represents a lesson – come with an open mind, and don’t hassle us if you don’t find what you’re looking for. I even saw the Australian and Canadian having sex on one of the beds. I guess I acted like a UN peace treaty negotiator and succeeded in bringing together Australia, Canada and the U.S. Oh, and it turns out that the club they had attended in Canada was "off-premise." Of course they saw a hot crowd there, "off-premise" events attract some very good-looking people who never actually play! But hey, if your man likes to get blue balls and you like to be sexually frustrated, it's a GREAT opportunity for you. You have a better chance of having sex in the champagne room than at an off-premise party.
So, back to the question, what does the “above-average” swinger look like? We screen all of our guests to ensure that everyone is attractive. Of course, it’s not fool-proof. Some guests submit pictures that were taken years earlier, or have been optimized. But, overall, you will not find a better crowd at a lifestyle event anywhere in the city. That I can guarantee.
Let me make it clear. There is no place for judgments or insults at my parties. For example, if you don’t like a voluptuous woman, move on. For the price of my parties (typically in the hundred dollar range for couples), my guests should realize the value they are getting. SoS events are INCREDIBLE. Why? I not only picture verify, but I call almost all of the female guests to make sure that they are comfortable. Additionally, I ask them questions before attending the party to make sure they would be a good fit. I also offer Swing School at no additional charge. The end result? Guests aren't as nervous, and they are ready to play! My guests know that I throw the best parties in the city; and the reputation is spreading. Because Rocco and I are in our mid 20's, we are able to attract a very young crowd -- and we do not price them out of attending. In fact, we have a scholarship program for students (above 21 only) who are curious to come but cannot afford to pay full price for admission. It should also be noted that we don’t accept everyone who applies to come to a party.
Certainly, if you act like the Canadian/Australian couple did, you will be asked to leave – and you won’t receive a refund.
Intelligent women have better sex, study reveals
Women with brains have more fun in bed than the average unbrainy woman, new research suggests.
To view the entire story, please click here:
I implemented my one strike policy following a string of unsuccessful attempts to find a decent guy to add to the mix. Heed my advice, female readers: don’t take shit from guys and go with your gut. This is also how I run my parties. Women are jewels to be adored. It is a male’s privilege to attend and he should never expect to get anything. The moment expectations enter into the equation, men become ruthless.
Well, enough about that. Recently, I started a contest – Swing in the City’s Biggest Dick competition. So far, I have received many pictures of beautiful cocks. By and large, the men have followed my instructions. I found the “final five,” and now I have to personally verify each and every cock…You know what that might mean ;)
Endowed contacted me with pictures and a message. Not only did he want to enter the competition, obviously, but he wanted to meet. He left a number, and I responded with my own. He called later in the evening; Rocco picked up and gave me the phone, “It’s a contest competitor.” I excitedly picked up the phone and began talking to Endowed. I told him that first and foremost, I was looking for a gentleman.
Endowed was indeed a really nice guy, and he seemed quite serious about meeting. He was young too. The final step was seeing if he would follow a few instructions in order to meet me. We agreed on meeting the next day. I gave him precise instructions to call me at a specific time the next morning to finalize the details.
Endowed called, and told me he was all set to come over. I told him to arrive in the general vicinity and call me. He did so, and I gave him my address. Fantastic, he followed directions. Endowed was a tall, next-door type of guy. He was very cute; and he looked very innocent. We spoke for awhile. I was wearing a sexy skirt and blouse. After a few minutes of conversation, Rocco sat next to me. I put my hand on Rocco’s crotch, and his cock grew erect. I grabbed the remote control, and asked Endowed what type of porno he liked. He wasn’t very demanding; he said that anything was fine. So we put on some gangbang porn.
I indicated that I was very interested to see Endowed’s cock in person. It didn’t take long for me to unbuckle his belt and take out his manhood. As I gently stroked Endowed’s cock, it started growing. I didn’t have any magic beans, but I sure made it grow like Jack's Beanstalk. It was not only long, but thick. I took it in my mouth. His cock was delicious; I attempted to take his cock as far into my mouth as possible. I took a lot of it, but there was a bit more remaining. I sucked it more aggressively and started using my hand to stroke it. Endowed moaned in ecstasy. He was clearly loving it; and his reaction encouraged me even more. I love sucking big dick, but I especially love giving oral to a guy who expresses some reaction. This was hot.
I grabbed Rocco and took his cock into my mouth. His thick cock filled my mouth. He got it nice and wet. The next thing I knew, he slid into my pussy. I was soaking wet, so it didn’t take more than a gentle glide for Rocco to get inside me, and deep. I took Endowed’s manhood back into my mouth while Rocco fucked me from behind. Endowed was on the couch getting some crazy head, as I was getting fucked by Rocco, who was standing up. It was a hot scene.
Rocco nearly made me cum, but I wanted to try this new cock out. I grabbed a Magnum and slid it onto Endowed’s cock. I got on top of him and rode his big dick. I fucked him hard. Rocco slapped my ass as he watched me take it. >I kept riding the big cock inside me. Endowed was moaning. “Ooooh fuck.” I fucked him even faster and felt him shake. He moaned again. I was fucking the shit out of Endowed’s big dick and he was on the edge. But I wanted him to cum, so I kept fucking him. Finally, he came hard inside me. I slid his cock out and saw a big load of cum in his Magnum. Whew!
But wait… there was more. Rocco was so turned on, he grabbed me and started fucking me really hard. I was a naughty girl and he gave it to me just right. He pumped me hard and fast until I started to cum. He came immediately after I did. Rocco always has good timing.
What a great hookup. I never promise to be impartial when judging my big dick competition, so I think we have a front runner… I wonder if anyone else will step up to the plate!
We started with a Swing School session to kick off the party. Our first record of the night was set as over a dozen couples arrived at 10pm to attend. I could see the excitement in the eyes of our guests as we had our informal discussion. Almost immediately after the session, our guests started chatting with each other. I forgot that the music was turned low, because I heard the hum of dozens of conversations going on. Every Swing School "student" gets an "A!" The reward? They all got some ;)
By 11pm, the house was packed. People took our advice -- come early, meet people, have fun! It's truly the recipe for a fantastic night. In fact, the only wall-flower was a promoter from another party... He couldn't believe that by 11:30pm, people were getting it on -- or the fact that we had guests as young as 21. Believe me when I say, we have the NEXT GENERATION of swingers at our parties.
In fact, one of the couples we were looking forward to meeting was a young Indian couple. D was handsome and well-dressed. His girlfriend, A, was extremely sexy -- she had an amazing body and a beautiful face. It was their first time at an event, and they were really horny. We hit it off right away, and A asked if Rocco and I would like to join them in one of the playrooms for some fun. I grabbed Rocco, and off we went.
We chose a small room for a bit more privacy; but since the room did not have a door, we soon had plenty of on-lookers. I began by making out with A. She was a great kisser and got me really excited. It didn't take long for both of us to unleash D's cock. We took turns sucking him off. I told A to lick one side of his shaft while I licked the other. D was loving it, and moaned. He got really turned on when I gave A some encouragement: "Yeah, suck his cock. I love it!" "Take his dick, that's it!" I stroked Rocco's cock at the same time.
Another lovely Indian girl, V, entered the room, dragging her new-found playmate. I spoke to V and her husband earlier in the day. They had registered last-minute, and I told them that we were at capacity for the event. The couple sounded so sweet that I couldn't refuse them. Specifically, V told me that it was her fantasy to be with another woman. Well, as I looked up and saw V making out with her sexy new friend, I knew that fantasy had been fulfilled. V moved over to the corner, and I encouraged A to come over. We did a 4 way ladies make-out session while D and Rocco watched. It was desi-licious!
Then another sexy woman entered the room. She took a seat on the bed, and waited for her man to change and come back. She was West-Indian, with beautiful boobs. East meets West! I saw Rocco's eyes open wide as she removed her top. I left them alone with a few minutes to make sure everything else was running smoothly.
By the time I came back, I saw Rocco in the corner with a woman who looked a bit like Angelina Jolie. She was Israeli and extremely aggressive. She had been giving Rocco a sort of lapdance, but he looked petrified. He locked his eyes on me and said, "Sex Kitten! Come over!" Apparently, the Israeli was biting him and really man-handling him. Rocco was a little scared because he didn't know her deal -- and she seemed pretty drunk. She was very attractive, but I think she felt a little intimidated by the scene. This was the youngest crowd she had ever seen at a swingers party, and she seemed to resent the fact that we were 26. She was apparently a regular at swinger parties in the city. She met A, who was 21, feel really odd as well by telling her, "when I was 21 - I was practically virgin."
Rocco was intrigued by the Israeli, but he didn't like the fact that she was accusing him of being a man-whore and asking him how much he charged! It was funny and disturbing at the same time. My friend Mate arrived in the nick of time. Rocco thought that Mate would be better suited to deal with the Israeli woman, so he introduced the two. Within minutes, they were fucking. Problem solved.
Our sexy shooter girl gave out glowsticks, and at the strike of midnight, we shut the lights in the back rooms. The guests flocked to those rooms, and some wild fun began. One of my blog readers has already asked what went on when the lights went out... I have to leave some things up to the imagination.
"Dear Sex Kitten,
My wife/girlfriend/sex buddy/Internet hookup will not be able to make it to your 'Couples and Single Women Swing Party.' She:
a) is not feeling well;
b) is terribly ill;
c) got her period early;
d) doesn't feel like swinging;
e) just found out her cat died; or
f) just broke up with me
Can I still come alone? I'm a really nice guy, I look good and I have an 8" cock."
I understand that sometimes, these men might be telling the truth and have a legitimate excuse. But more often, I believe this problem is due to the fact that men register for parties WITHOUT telling their supposed female guest. These guys waste my time, and it's pretty pathetic. They are the first ones to ask for pictures of our other guests (which i NEVER provide), make requests of me (i.e. "my girl and I really want an Asian girl, will one be there?"), and ask every last detail that I have already answered through this blog and the SoS FAQ.
Regardless of the excuse, if the party is clearly for couples and single women, then all single men will be denied admission. Fellas, I understand that sometimes you can't find a woman to get you into a swing party. If you're not coming as a real couple, you should not come to a couples-only event. And, you shouldn't force your lady to come because you and her will end up having a horrible night. When I speak with the women on the phone, I quickly find out the real deal -- and I never grant admission to couples in which the female does not want to attend. If you want to come as a single male, you have to wait for an SoS event that allows select single males in. To be considered for such a party, follow my precise instructions on the SoS website on how to apply; be courteous, be polite, don't seem desperate, (i.e. don't keep emailing me and telling me how you're such a nice guy) be honest and you will be considered. It's not that hard, is it?
Also, why do these guys all think they have an 8" cock? Are they using a metric ruler and mistaking centimeters for inches?
The party is open to single females and couples, and I will be bringing an entourage of hand-picked single males for me and some of my horny female friends (yes, a few of the blog regulars will in attendance).
If you're used to lifestyle events without any action, or less than stellar crowds -- come check out the party. The atmosphere is very friendly and provocative. Of course, I am always very welcoming of beginners.
What can you expect? Horny, sexy people; complimentary vodka drinks; lots of action -- and Swing School for beginners. If you're a horny girl who is looking for a safe place to play, or a couple looking for playmates, be sure to RSVP online.
I have sectioned off a special fantasy room for my sexxxy guests who want to know what happens when the lights go out...at midnight.