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Couples and single ladies only.

Upscale lifestyle parties for the extremely sexy and open-minded.

Ladies only.

Where wine & conversation break free!

Open to select single men, couples, and single females.

Take a walk on the wild side with women who love multiple men.




Sexxxy Boat

In the waters of the St. Lawrence River in Montreal, Quebec, Canada, there used to be a boat like no other that sailed every summer. It was a boat full of swingers. Yes, my readers, I am talking about the one and only Montreal Sexy Boat. Although no longer in operation, the Sexy Boat was one of the more interesting swing parties I have attended. Interesting, but not necessarily hot.

During a visit to Montreal in 2006, Rocco and I made reservations for a night aboard the infamous vessel. The boat was docked in a region that was approximately 45 minutes from the city, and it was a bit of an excursion through quite a few streets missing signs. We managed to get to the dock early and boarded the Montreal Sexy Boat. We were excited to meet all the people on-board. Everyone was friendly, especially the captain and his crew.

As we set sail, the captain of the boat, Jean Hammel, started playing the theme song from The Love Boat. After we all settled down, the captain made an announcement saying that once we are past a certain point on the water, we would be free to do whatever we wanted. Rocco and I could not wait to see what would happen.

The size of the boat could accommodate about 40 people. It was a full house. There was a food area set up with drinks inside the boat. Also inside the boat were about 3 beds partitioned into semi-private rooms. There was a large sitting/dance area where most people hung out throughout the night. People could go outside the boat as well, but on this bitter-cold night, most people stayed inside with the exception of the smokers taking smoking breaks.

Rocco and I noticed that most of the attendees were in their late 40's and 50's--typical of a normal swing scene. However, besides us, there was only one other couple under 35. As the night went on, we went around and spoke with a few other couples. We had some good conversations and were enjoying ourselves. There was definitely a good vibe at the party.

The captain went on the speaker again and told us that we were free to swing! However, no one engaged in play for a long time. As the night progressed, I wondered when people would start the action. Rocco and I sat around the lounge/dance area and watched the young couple. The woman, although she was probably a decade older than us, was the closest to age. Her boyfriend sat down and watched her dance on the floor all by herself. All eyes were on her and we all were watching her to see if she'd do anything besides take off her top and dance in her bra. But, she didn't. What a tease! I've seen women at Pacha (a dance club in NYC) that have done significantly more on the dance floor than this lady did all night. If I wanted to watch a woman tease people all night long, I would have gone to an off-premise swing event [where intercourse is prohibited]. Wasn't the whole idea of the Sexy Boat to have on-premise fun on the water? So, we walked away from the tease of a dance floor to see if we could find anyone doing anything.

We walked over to the area of the boat which had the beds laid out. There were 3-4 couples who were engaging in some fun. There was an large, middle-aged man on top of his wife fucking her missionary style. Across from him, two women were eating each other out. Although it was a fun scene, we weren't able to find any cool, compatible people. Hey, at least some people took advantage of the real Love Boat...

I should note that the pictures I've used in this post are significantly hotter than any of the actual people who attended the event! The Montreal Sexy Boat was a great concept, but it made me think, "will we ever find the right type of party?" That was 2006. Little did I know that Rocco and I would soon go on a quest to bring high quality events to young, attractive guests here in NYC. Oh, and speaking of the high seas, I have some incredible news -- I'm in negotiations to have several YACHT parties next summer!!! So summer '10 will be the summer of swinging on the Hudson!

National Topless Day Update

Venice Beach, California

Sex Toy of the Year

The We-Vibe was voted as the Sex Toy of the Year by Sue Johanson, LoveHoney and BetterSex. The We-Vibe was developed by a Canadian couple, Bruce and Melody Murison, after Bruce was laid off by Nortel in 2003. Bruce has a background in electro-mechanics and always had an inventor's mind.

The vision for the We-Vibe came during a trip back home to Ottawa from New York City. The Murisons first got the idea of designing a vibrator that a woman could wear while making love, with no straps, no wires, and two separate motors that could stimulate the clitoris and the G-Spot at the same time. “Seven hours in the car kind of makes you go a little crazy for things to talk about,” says Bruce Murison. “It was literally 30 seconds out of a seven-hour conversation where we got the idea for the We-Vibe.”

When the Murisons returned home, Bruce began researching sex toys online that could be used by a couple at the same time. However, nothing of the sort existed at the time. At that moment, Bruce realized he was on to something. There was no dual vibrator on the market that could be worn while making love that would not replace the man. The Murisons gathered money to research and develop their product by re-financing a mortgage on their house and borrowing money from friends and family. Five years later, the We-Vibe hit markets and it's been a best selling sex toy ever since.

The story of the product is very inspiration to me, especially in a weak economy. I read about the care Bruce Murison had taken into developing this product. The We-Vibe is constructed of medical grade silicone and is phthalate free and has no smell or taste. It weighs about 2 oz. and is completely wireless and rechargeable-making it a "green" toy. It has dual speeds and can set to high or low vibration speeds.

I saw the product in action at the June 20th erotic event I hosted. My friends, Felicia and Gregory, brought their We-Vibe with them. I was fascinated by watching the two of them. Gregory mounted Felicia and slid his big dick inside her with a funny looking purple device, which was on top of her pussy. I went in for a closer look and realized, it was the We-Vibe. I watched the two of them switch up positions and Felicia kept the We-Vibe inside for a long time. The two of them kept fucking and fucking. When they finished, I asked them to show me how the device worked. Felicia showed me how easy it was to use. Perhaps as much as its functionality, I was fascinated by the design. An engineering masterpiece, it was very functional while remaining slick, smooth, and from an aesthetic perspective it was "pretty."

A lot of thought and care went into developing the We-Vibe and its shows. Gregory and Felicia were having fun using it, and I was excited at the prospect of reviewing one of these marvels. I had heard very good things about the product from other people and read stellar online reviews. But, was the product really as good as the hype? For those that have come out and taken a ride on my Sybian, you may ask yourselves, "Can any toy be better than this $1300 machinery?"

Well, I am going to answer all these questions in my full review of the We-Vibe that I will publish shortly. Stay tuned, ladies and gentlemen, alike. You have never before seen the likes of such an innovative toy that can be used by a woman WHILE she's fucking a man. In fact, I may even try to use it while fucking two dicks (or maybe more!) next time. Now, I know for a fact there is no other toy out there that a lady can use when she's getting naughty by fucking two or more men. Believe me, I've looked. Thank you, Bruce and Melody. You have truly created a one-of-a-kind sex toy. Full review to come, shortly.

Ask Sex Kitten -- Where Can I Meet Other Like-Minded Couples (or Singles) in My Area?

This week's question is from Seeking in New Jersey:

My husband and I are very new to all this. We had a fantastic time attending the Freedom party last weekend and met a few great couples. Unfortunately, we located in south-Jersey while the couples we met were based out of NYC. We don't get a chance to get up to New York more than once a month, so this presents a problem in terms of meeting our new friends. There is also a lack of any quality parties in south Jersey. Is there any way to find like minded couples (or single ladies) in our area?

Thanks again for attending the party! There is most definitely a great way to meet others -- online. I've tried all of the swingers personal sites out there, and most look like they were designed in 1999 at the peak of the dot com boom long before I could even legally drink. Disappointing to say the least, and not much functionality. Hands down the BEST site out there is Kasidie, which is also one of the newest swingers sites out there. In order to penetrate the market, Kasidie is charging $99.99 for lifetime membership for a LIMITED time. This is a fantastic value!

The creators of Kasidie are a real swinging who are putting their heart and soul into developing the best social network for couples anywhere online. Kasidie's presence in NYC is growing -- and they are about to explode! Next week, they are being featured on the Tyra Banks Show and they are an official sponsor of Behind Closed Doors, the hottest lifestyle events in the city. My advice is to get in on a lifetime membership NOW and enjoy all the benefits.

Kasidie began as a newsletter with content similar to Swing in the City. The site is filled with useful advice, stories, and event news. I will also be working with Kasidie in order to develop their newsletter and include some of my own content.

Not convinced yet? Well, any couples who register for lifetime membership to Kasidie by clicking will receive $30 off admission to ANY Behind Closed Doors event until the end of the year.

Have you ever wanted to professionally photograph a PORN STAR?

I recently got in touch with Italian Photographer Gabrio Linari and found out some exciting news -- he's coming to NYC in order to present "Pornstar Workshop" on Sunday October 4th, 2009. This event is for anyone interested in photography who has dreamed of shooting a real porn star!

Gabrio's vision of teaching his progressive style of photography with his twist of artistic flair, created the idea of bringing porn and art together in a “hands on” workshop, where photographers will learn all aspects and styles from the perspective of the eye of another and be able to adopt these styles while working with a live model.

Linari’s concept of a Pornstar muse is dynamic in the sense that it adds an element of celebrity to the event as a whole. Why not shoot a regular model? Simply because it is not half as exciting! Photographers who generally do not have the opportunity or luxury of shooting some of our industry’s sexiest stars will be graced with such an opportunity right here with Gabrio for one day to learn from the best!

This combination of Glamour Nude Workshop and Pornstar Celebrity element created this incredible niche that has captured the attention of the media and the birth of the “Pornstar Workshop” has arrived and hence the launch of the website:– a website featuring the hottest pornstars as the muse for one of the industry’s most well known photography moguls, Gabrio Linari.

To honor the very first workshop, none other than the industry’s most sexy, sultry celebrity model, Sunny Leone, will be our Porn Star muse for the event being held October 4th 2009 in NYC.

To top it off, an element of fine Italian dining with fine Italian wine will be enjoyed by all. Gabrio Linari, amongst his many talents, has the palette for incredible Gnocchi that he will prepare and serve for our special guests who sign up to participate at Pornstar Workshop. Sunny Leone of course, is the guest star!

So what are you waiting for? REGISTER TODAY

Go Topless Day-August 23rd

If you see something wrong with the above picture comparison, you may want to join the march of topless women on Sunday, August 23rd, 2009. Come out and and support women who want uphold their right to bare their breasts.

Time and Location: Central Park - Columbus Circle 59th W. Street (between 8 ave and 5 ave). March starts at noon - Speech at 1pm

Click here for more information.

Naked New York

Have you ever seen a naked person doing a strip dance on a subway in New York City? Apparently, women and men have performed strip shows right on those poles in the subways! Yet another reason to carry some hand-sanitizer. If you have seen these performances, let us know? Leave a comment about your experience.

And, why did they take away the Voyeur Bus?? If you can have Hooters Airlines, why not the Voyeur Bus? Hey, it's the only way to travel.

Check out the full story seen here:

Men Like Drawings of "Average" Women

According to a study performed, men prefer drawings of "average women-say 36-28-38 and 5-foot-4" to drawings that look like Playboy models. Really, the study was based on DRAWINGS of women!

You can read more about it here by clicking here.

Ask Sex Kitten-Can You Offer Sex Toy Advice?

This week's question comes from Kinky Kathy. She writes:

Dear SK,

I love to masturbate. I would think you do as well and was wondering if you have any favorite sex toys you can recommend to me?


Kinky Kathy

Dear Kinky,

First of all, let me say that I am so happy to hear from you! Women need to know that masturbation is fun and can help enhance their sexuality and sexual experiences. Rocco bought me a Venus panty vibrator back in the day when they were wired. I put it underneath my clothes and he liked to turn up the juice while we engaged in some naughty role-play. Nowadays, wires have been eliminated from these toys and they can be controlled using a remote control. So, if you want to have some fun at work, Kinky Kathy...

There's even a vibrator that jams to the sound of your music player, such as an iPod. If you want to go on a real wild ride; put on some heavy metal. Although, you may not be able to walk after you cum. Gives new meaning to the song "Good Vibrations."

You have come to the right source to ask for unbiased opinions on sex toys. I have a lot and the collection keeps growing. I will soon need to rent out a warehouse space just for the toys alone (and, perhaps another one for the sexy outfits that can only be worn in the bedroom and at erotic events)! I have everything from the Rabbit Habit, as made famous by the Sex and the City series to the Sybian, a $1315 machine which is considered the ultimate vibrator.

I will be more than glad to share my thoughts on these products with the readers. And, as for the men--pay attention. Some of the toys are made for couples and if you want to give a lady the gift that keeps on giving, I will have some suggestions for you.

I am very excited to review the We-Vibe, the Sex Toy of the Year! Stay tuned for my review in the upcoming weeks.

The Heat is On

This year, I wanted to do something special on my birthday. So, Rocco and I planned the Summer Heat erotic event last Saturday to coincide with my birthday celebration. And, it was a night I will never forget!

We had an array of fun activities planned for the party -- including the Sybian machine, a fantastic body artist, a sexy outfit contest, and a great DJ-- so we didn't want anyone to miss out on any of the fun. So, we instructed our guests to arrive promptly. Now, I know what you're thinking--this is NYC and everyone is fashionably late, right? Wrong. I think I managed to convince them, because our guests were so prompt that two couples arrived half-hour before the party even began! I guess they were excited and wanted to ensure their entrance -- they knew it would be a popular night. I met some of the sweet and eager new SoS members at the door. They informed me, "This is our first time attending something like this." I reassured them that there was absolutely nothing to worry about and there were a lot of first time couples attending Swing School. I was also greeted by a couple who were involved in the lifestyle for a while, "John" and "Lilly." Although they were not new to the scene, they took my advice and came out to Swing School for the opportunity to get first dibs on conversing with the newbies. They also were kind enough to give me a birthday present!

As I greeted the guests, I noticed some familiar faces as they came in. Leilene and Charlie! I met this couple a few weeks ago at a phantom swing party where the host (and ALL other guests) failed to show up. Leilene, Charlie and I laughed about the party -- and the circumstances in which we met. In fact, they wanted me to entitle this blog entry: "Leilene and Charlie go to Their FIRST Swingers Party 2.0." Their second crack at attending a party was a triumph -- they apparently had the time of their lives!

Our friend Liz came with a hunky personal trainer as her date, and he was yummy. Sexxy hottie Jackie wore a jaw-dropping red dress that made me want to sing the song "Lady in Red." Her man, Lawrence was looking sexy as always. Lawrence is probably the biggest Swing in the City blog fan I have ever met! He literally QUOTES passages of my blog to me! I love it! My girl Athena came out to the party and she was looking hot. Greg and Lynn were back-Greg, standing at 6'4", was the unofficial biggest cock winner at the last July 3rd party and his lady looked smokin' in her outfit. Mia and Evan also came to play. I had met Mia at the July 3rd party and inducted her my "lovely" assistant. Zach and Angelina returned as well. For those that went to the July 3rd party-you cannot forget these two. Angelina had put a bow on Zach's huge cock. You've heard of "dick in a box," now, there's "bow on a dick." There were so many sexy ladies and cute guys, I had a difficult time focusing on what I was saying a few times while talking -- my attention would shift to all the hotties I was surrounded with. Also in attendance were some of our new friends including Alice and Aiden who I met via Twitter; a lovely trio-Jordan, Jaquelyn and Josephine who had experienced sexy fun in college but never at a large party and Ariel and Andre and Emma and Jackson--also newcummers. Oh man, that's WAY too many aliases for me to keep track of!

Our body artist immediately attracted the attention of the ladies. He picked up his brush to paint the ladies gorgeous bodies and didn't put it down until the end of the party. I have never seen such a talented and amazing person work so hard. Honestly, Danny of dSetia is like the Michelangelo of body art. He was so passionate and creative--every woman had a different design painted on her body. One lady had gotten a picture of a woman painted on her back. Ariel, an adorable and intelligent young lady, had a painting of a fish covering the entire top portion of her back. I think it took Danny about 40 minutes to paint it! If you would like more information on his work, please visit his website by clicking here. He would love to work with you and can paint at all kinds of parties, not just sexy ones. As promised, I will be posting pictures of his work on the Yahoo group soon!

I set up my Sybian near the dance floor area for the ladies to try it out. Since my other Sybian blew a fuse at the June 20 event and had to be sent to the factory, I ordered a brand spanking new one. It was a complete virgin--I didn't even have the chance to break it in yet. I couldn't wait to give the ladies a chance to ride the machine. I host the Female Orgasm Workshop featuring the Sybian for women and couples but I also like to bring it to the parties whenever I can. For those that don't know, the Sybian is considered the "ultimate vibrator" and has been featured on Howard Stern. Women such as Carmen Electra and Jenna Jameson have rode the Sybian -- and always experience fantastic orgasms on it. I am proud to say that SoS is the only erotic party in NYC to make use of the device, and offer its orgasmic services at parties for no additional cost. Of course, the women of SoS love it!

As soon as I set up the machine, I had an eager volunteer who wanted to ride. This pretty lady was not at all shy. In fact, she was such a cutie that I will call her "Bella." Her handsome friend, Alonzo, watched her hop right onto the Sybian. I had turned the Sybian on for about 30 seconds when Bella exclaimed, "STOP! I came!" I think she may hold the current fastest record for orgasming on the Sybian. The ladies watching her couldn't believe their eyes-they had to try for themselves to see what the hype was all about. One after one, the women came to ride the Sybian and came! Lilly informed me that she had ridden horses before. This experience came in handy because she manned the Sybian with skill! The spunky and energetic Leilene hopped on for her turn. I was soooooo happy to see her and Charlie have such a great night! They really deserve it after their first shitty experience at a so-called "swingers party."

As soon as I finished with the Sybian, I turned around and saw three ladies making Saran Wrap dresses. The gorgeous ladies stripped down and were wearing nothing but Saran Wrap around their breasts and hips. Jordan, Jacqueline and Josphine were running out to grab some water after an extreme sex session. I was happy they could truly enjoy each other as a Male-Female-Female trio. It's great to see a couple and a single lady come out together and have such an amazing time at a swingers party. The ladies looked so innocent but now I know they have their naughty side! Everyone was having a great time!

Our bikini contestants were eager to win when the judging began. One lady, with what I call va-va-voom breasts, was wearing a Pocahontas bikini. She was too shy to enter the contest but she was definitely a contestant. First up was my girl Leilene. Second, was Miss Bella. And third was a young and sweet lady, Emma. I had met Emma and Jackson just two days before the party. The two of them were so young they reminded me of Rocco and myself when we first started out in the lifestyle. Just like me, Emma was the one who brought up the idea of threesomes and moresomes to her man. I'm so glad I did not have to judge the contest--what a task! We let the crowd decide the winner. Anyhow, all three were winners as far as I was concerned and they all received complimentary SoS Membership and admittance to the next party.

Mia and Evan wanted to give me a special birthday surprise. Mia grabbed me and took me on the dance floor. She is such a seductress--I can't even recall exactly what happened because I think I was under her spell. I remember her grabbing my breasts and grinding down on me. She then bent her knees and got down and danced up on me. All I know is, Mia can dance with me any time! I was so turned on; so was Evan. Mia started giving him head right in the middle of everything! Mia, Evan, Jackie, Lawrence, Bella, Alonzo, Rocco and I went back to the play areas. We played along side each other. Mia straddled her man Evan and rode him. It looked like she was giving him a lapdance but she was actually fucking him! I looked down and grabbed her clit as she took her man's cock inside her pussy. She was creaming all over and moaning. Jackie and I sucked off Lawrence. Rocco had his cock out and I gave him a lick. It was so hot--we were putting the HEAT in SUMMER HEAT! On the bed in front of us was Zach and Angelina. If you know these two, they can fuck for hours and hours and they did. She just kept fucking his huge cock; they put on quite a show!

I also got a chance to play with Gerald. I sat down next to his girl and he wanted to go down on me. I saw his girl was a little shy so the two of us played while Gerald ate me out. He made me cum once and then another time. After that, I really needed a cock inside me. Fortunately, Alonzo was sitting right next to me. I took out his dick-hello! He had a nice, big one. I was so excited that I took him to one of the play rooms and grabbed one of my Magnums (yes, I always come prepared - with the gold standard). Rocco was running around managing the party, but I wanted to play with him a bit and have him walk in on me getting fucked by Alonzo. He must have followed the sounds of my moans, because he found me within a few minutes. He walked into the play area and saw me taking Alonzo's long cock. Rocco smiled and unleashed his hard cock within seconds. I quickly changed positions and took Rocco's cock on my mouth while Alonzo fucked me. I kept cumming and cumming.

We switched positions and Rocco fucked me doggy style while I sucked Alonzo's beautiful penis. Another couple started to have their fun. When I looked around to see who it was-it was Emma and Jackson! Emma was riding Jackson, who was on the floor, crabby-style! These two were like acrobats. I actually took a second away from fucking my two guys to look at them! I was fascinated and so glad to see them have a great time! After cumming a few times, I needed a break. But, I wanted Alonzo to deposit his cum on my boobs. I asked him to take his dick out of my pussy, take his Magnum off and jerk off to me. He granted my wish and deposited his load all over my tits and give me a pearl necklace. It was a hot scene.

At the end of the night, the party was over but the couples didn't want to leave. Greg and Lynn had found an awesome couple who had stumbled upon the SoS party by mistake on their way to another swingers party that had either gotten canceled or had relocated without any notice. I spoke with the couple and Rocco and I felt so bad that they had pre-paid for this other party and had nowhere to go. When we talked to them, we decided to invite them in to our party because they were really cool. We were so glad we did because they hit it off with Greg and Lynn.

Meanwhile, Leilene and Greg, who were fucking for a long while now were still going at it! I saw Leilene give her man head. She told me he had a nice cock that curved up and she was right. I watched and licked my lips. Leilene and Greg had hooked up with Andre and Ariel-another fantastic couple. Leilene made not only Andre cum but also Ariel! It was the first time Ariel had cum with another girl. The two couples were super sweet and sexy and I was impressed by Leilene's skills.

What a night-we didn't get home until 6:30AM. It was well worth the lack of sleep the next day! Thank you for everyone that came out and made my day so special. For those that couldn't make it out to the party, don't worry-we're doing it again in September. Any SoS member who wishes to apply for the next party, please use your membership number or email address to reapply. You no longer have to refill the entire application process if you are an approved member and have an active membership. We are also working on a special members only section of the website for your convenience. See you all then!

Fuck Team Five and a Tuesday Night Romp!

Other than running the School of Sex, hosting erotic events and helping women achieve orgasm on the Sybian, I am also an avid fan of porn films. Unfortunately, I am not a big fan of many of the porn movies out there. I get bored with one on one sex starring Ken and Barbie. I like porn that is also entertaining. No, I'm not talking about elaborate scripts like "Pirates"; I want a porn with a good setup. I have recently started watching Fuck Team Five, and the premise is awesome!

A group of sexy mamis venture out to various locations, like porn shops and office buildings, to find everyday average Joes to fuck.

The series is hilarious and quite entertaining. Last week, Nigel, Rocco and I got together and I took the two boys on while watching Fuck Team Five. I enjoyed Nigel's thick dick squeeze into my pussy as I sucked on Rocco's cock. So, I guess watching the girls seduce the boys on TV can be a turn on and maybe a little rubbed off on me. These ladies know what they want -- and take it!

I reached out to my friends at Bang Bros, the producers of the Fuck Team Five series, and Swing in the City will now feature Bang Bros pictures and videos in my postings. I absolutely love this company because they have very original series and keep the viewers entertained. If you would like to view some of the Bros' videos and pictures, click on any of the pictures above or the videos here:

Summer Heat was a SCORCHER!

Everyone in NYC knows how hot it gets in August--the high temperature will be 92 today, August 10th. As hot as today is, Saturday night was sizzlin'! I am, of course, referring to the SoS Summer Heat Erotic Event! Thank you to everyone that came out. The party was a wild success. As usual, our attendees were extremely sexy, open-minded, and friendly. The icing on the cake was that it was also my birthday -- and boy did I celebrate!

I'm not quite sure if I'm all recovered from the party. At least we can smile when asked, "So, what'd you do this weekend?"

I will be posting some of the reviews I have received from the attending guests, who were THRILLED! If you would like to submit a review, please send me an email.

And, if you're on SDC, Sexxymofo, or SLS -- write "SchoolOfSex" a certification and a review, and we'll do the same in return.

In the next week, I will also post some pictures of the body art by dSetia on the sexy bodies of our female guests to the Yahoo group. If you would like to join, please enter your email address here:

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Welcome to all the new SoS members! We hope to see everyone on September 18 when SoS co-sponsors the premiere NYC lifestyle event - BEHIND CLOSED DOORS.

Ask Sex Kitten-Am I a Slut?

This week's question comes from Ms. Confused. She writes:

Dear Sex Kitten, I believe I am a very sexual woman and love to have sex. I am recently divorced and have been out on the dating scene. I have joined a few dating sites and have been contemplating joining swingers personal sites for some no strings attached fun. I don't want to sleep with the men I date on our first date because I don't want them to use me for sex and leave me. At the same time, I need some way to explore my sexuality and have fun without being judged by men in a SAFE environment. After reading your blog entry about how the woman that met up with a guy from online to have sex with was mistreated, I am now scared to meet men for the sole purpose of having sex. I read the School of Sex reviews from the single women about how they feel comfortable at your parties and am considering coming to one. However, since I will be coming alone, will I be judged and called a slut? What if I only want to play with men and not other women? Will women and couples make fun of me or call me a tramp? Please help, Ms. Confused

Dear Lady Confused,

Thank you so much for bringing up this important issue. Rest assured that you are not the first woman I have met with these types of concerns. In fact, us women have to deal with a lot of demeaning labels society throws at us. When a man casually hooks up with a woman (or TWO women), he is a playa--he's the man! When women want to have fun with a man (or dare I say, TWO men) society labels her a slut. So, I would firstly like to say to you and everyone else reading this post, please, let's do away with labels. The terms slut, whore, freak, etc. have no business being used in a swing party (unless being called that kind of turns you on and it's said in a playful manner).

Secondly, if you do use the swingers hook up sites such as SexxyMofo and SDC, please make sure you check the ratings of the people you meet. Always meet in a public area where you will not be in danger. I have written some further advice in the article seen here.

Lastly, it is perfectly natural for you to want to experiment with multiple men. You sound like the kind of lady that would love a triple-stranded pearl necklace. I can tell you that the single ladies come out and keep coming back to SoS parties because they have a good time and feel safe. If I did not provide a safe, pressure-free environment, the ladies would never come back and would probably warn all their friends. To the contrary, the ladies that come out experience an exhilarating, fun-filled evening and spread the word to let all their female friends know about the parties. In fact, some ladies like to come out in groups or as Mystery, the Pick-Up Artist, calls it--in "sets." But, if you come alone and make it out to Swing School, you will see that all the other guests are very nice and down-to-Earth.

If you simply want to watch your first time, there is never any pressure to do anything more. If you want to join in on the fun, you are free to do so. You are free to choose whom you want to play with and whom you do not. The ball is in your court and the choice is always yours. I believe that just by choosing your sexual partners, you are negating the very definition of the word slut. So, don't worry, you will not be called any derogatory names and will not be judged at SoS. After all, isn't that what the sexual exploration lifestyle is all about?

If you would like more information on parties that cater to women who want multiple men, please feel free to check out the XXXtreme Events website. XXXtreme is the only group in NYC where single men are permitted to come, unescorted. SoS is currently only throwing parties for single ladies and couples. However, if you would like to play with the male half of the couple at an SoS party, you can do so as long as the female is agreeable with it -- which the overwhelming majority are.

Nina Hartley Endorses SoS

Nina Hartley, porn star and sexual educator extraordinaire, was in NYC this week giving lectures on various sex topics, including a workshop on 3somes and swinging. A California native, Nina wasn't so familiar with the swing scene here in NYC. But it didn't take much for her to find out that the best action was at School of Sex (SoS).

Nina's workshops are amazingly informative, but when she heard that SoS performs live demonstrations and has a Sybian machine -- her eyes lit up. I invited Nina to come to our Summer Heat event on Saturday but due to her early morning flight she couldn't make it. But, the good news is, Nina wants to help teach Swing School with me at a future event. So, you never know when she'll stop by!

Nina mentioned School of Sex THREE TIMES during her workshop as one of the best ways to meet like-minded, sexually open people in NYC.

Hear it for yourself:

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iPhone App Rates How Good You are in Bed

A new iPhone App, Passion iPhone, rates your sexual performance. I'm not sure if I would reach for my phone during sex to take measurements of my love-making abilities, but maybe some people will. Although if it works, women could really use this tool. Seeing a man's sexual performance rating BEFORE jumping in bed with them may turn out to be extremely beneficial!

Check out the full story here.